Oh, and happy chinese new year everyone, and anyone! =)

Hey...

Yesterday was an ok day. Just stayed home and practiced more... I really should start doing stuff on my viola. Been doing violin these few days... For what? For Sibelius and Bruch... And Bach.

Watched tv also. Later in the evening went to grandma's house for reunion dinner. What can I say. I think my cousins are hostile, or maybe that's just the way they speak with other. Anyhow. After dinner just sat and watched tv. Again.

And I realise how fragile this barrier of indifference that I create is so fragile... All it needed was some sort infiltration by an insider... Everything that I worked to create has been torn down leaving me naked, bare, with nothing to cover me.

Or more specifically, there is nothing to hide my feelings with anymore. Everything's been blown wide open like a firecracker with a watermelon.

So now I wait again.

And I just prepare myself for the very worst.

Still... I do wish for certain things. Nevermind if I can't get them. At least I lived in a fantasy once before.

My house is devoid of sound except the running fan.

I have practiced till my fingers feel like dropping. Still, I have not expressed myself enough in my world of empty rooms, where the music from my heart is the only thing that still lives, and beats.

I played the first minute of sibelius over and over and over. Because I don't have the score, I just have to play based on what I've heard. I've played the first few seconds of the scottish over and over and over. I don't have the score too so I play from memory. I've played the first minute of chaconne over and over and over. I can't be bothered to look at the score and learn from where I stopped off. I could only memorize till there. Besides, I am in too much turmoil to learn anything.

AND STILL I BURN. Now there is no shortage of tears anymore. What am I? A wreck. Why? Because I allowed myself to be, that's why. Lessons learnt over and over and freaking over and yet they do not sink in, I continue to collide against concrete. These conflictions pull me apart, and there goes my humanity. I curse and I swear and I be violent against all that obstruct me, because I have no energy to hold these rushes of hot blood anymore. I can only do so much as to hold this ultimate monster. Its not frustration nor anger nor hate. You decide what it is.

I have duties that I have so skilfully neglected, and now I feel the pain. It is my fault, it truly is. And I aplogise to all who have looked to me for something, one way or another, yet I have not delivered. IT IS MY FAULT. Though I wish these burdens could taken off my shoulders. I don't want to work like this anymore... To be the one responsible for everything... I work silently behind the scenes, to the glorious perfection of a joyous event. Yet I stay not to enjoy the fruits of my labour, for I cannot. I have to do the work so that the show goes on. By the time I am relieved, the stage is empty, waiting for my triumphant entry. Yet... The auditorium is empty as well. And I face the voidness and emptiness...

ALONE.

No one sees me going about.

No one understands how much I let go for it.

But still I go on, and I do wonder why?

Can YOU tell me why?

Can YOU tell me why things are like this? Why I ponder and pain over such things. Why I'm pulled apart between duties and dreams so very often? I don't like this, to put it vaguely and simply.

I HATE IT.

So today was a day where I learned many things. At least its a start, to become who I really want to be.

It was Ming Yi's bday!! So Li Wei got her a cake. Ran around trying to find a lighter, and got one from the man at the canteen indian stall. It was a joint celebration for Ming Yi and Lin Xi whose bday was the sunday before! =D Returned the lighter to the nice indian man. Well the cake was chocolate. Which makes it a good cake. Haha! And Han Lu played Jay Chou's qing tian on the guitar for them and I sang along! Skipped all the impossibly high parts.

Anyway I just slacked through the CNY celebrations at the class bench. Watched the always interesting mass dance, but was too shagged to join in. And other reasons. I just sat, watched remembered and was amused.

Went down to fac dance though. Janice, Gareth and Shao Ning pestered. I dragged myself there. And was humiliated cuz honestly, I don't know how to do the dance at all.

Oh yes, I forget. Our CNY street market stall was a raving success. My efforts in lugging a container to store the drinks from home paid off. And of course when me and Yan Long walked to 7-11 to lug somemore ice back. We sold the drinks cheap, 50c for two cups. And we had a profit!! Of 33.33%! Yep so that was a good thing. I was happy, because so many people helped out.

=)

Was just whiling time away. Went to the orch room and took out dun jie's violin. Its so sweet and I played the above 3 pieces over and over and over.

Went home, practiced the same pieces over and over and over again.

Poured my heart out.

Well at least I practiced today.

And learnt many things today.

Nevermind that I'm still alone.

Yet who can hear? Who can understand?

Who??

The silence remains, it rings like death in my ear. Everything that happened today was so different from what I've been expecting. I keep it all inside like a boulder. I talk and laugh and act like a goofer, but in the end... I cannot escape reality, of what I have failed.

There are just so many doubts that it is like it never existed.

The music stops, and the heart wilts. Let the new layer surface, I beg, I plead.

I concede.

Nothing much, except I got screwed left right center by pang yesterday.

Other than that...

There's something new bugging me now. Everything seems right you know, everything points to one obvious conclusion.

Yet I hesitate to tread into this unknown territory. To risk it all. My life, my reputation, my mind. And my heart. What's left of it. How can I be certain of anything??

It's absurd. How people speak to me with such conviction, yet I have no confidence of my own.

I bide my time.

Got so much good stuff from judy today! Ice cream and lots of bach partita recordings. Sibelius Violin, and Shosty Violin. Haha! Treasures!! Finally have a chaconne on cd.

You make me feel so caged, so watched, so pressured to be who you want me to be.

What happened to the past warmth? Or is it just me.

Alone.

Hey...

Today's been a fun day!!

Went out with the OG 26 people! Went to Cine and watched memoirs of a geisha. Well... For me it was a long drawnout movie, and I went to pee for the first time ever while watching a movie. Haha... But some others said the movie was nice, so I dunno. Haha. I guess you'll have to catch it yourself.

After that went to take Neoprints. Eek! Waste money, that's what all the guys thought. Haha!

Oh and met Janice! Apparently she was watching in the same theater as us! And met her and another guy called Yi Quan, again, on 171, with Lysia, while going home.

I don't smile alot??? =/

Hey!

Today's SNYO rehearsal was fun! Mr Lim was in a good mood, Jon Lim did something damn stupid but it was so hilarious i laughed all the way till break time. We started doing spiccato without moving the bow, just moving the viola. Haha. Just 3hrs of wacky stuff. Damn fun! That's what I go to rehearsals for!

So now I'll just live in bliss for a while.. I don't want to face reality, just to indulge in this fairy tale while I still can. Though I know I'll have to snap outta it some time... There's always something holding me back.

Hey.

Today's... Been bad. At least it wasn't so good as yesterday. Was quite depressed after... Aiya. What does it matter anyway. At least those people mocking me had fun. Yeah, well I'm willing to accept that.

But that doesn't stop it from... From... I shall cease to elaborate.

I smile now. But I wonder at what. At the realisation of certain things? They are sad things that I discover, but still, I cherish them as unescapable, undebatable solid fact. At least its hard ground I know I step upon, not thin ice.

Anyway on to happier stuff, my massage technique works! And Nigel was damn amazed when I was walking without a limp today! Yay! Yep, so anybody who's sprained an ankle, come to me okay? I'll teach you something that you can do so that it won't hurt, and heal damn fast too. Right now the swelling is really little.

Haha. Other random stuff... Wrote a stupid little compo during chinese lesson today, peppering the teacher with comments. Haha! And of course fang zhou crashed and I hung around with her a while.

Yep.

Truths may hurt but they don't terrorise. That's why I'm content with what I have.

Argh, busy!!

Just created the class blog, yay!!

Today's been a great day. Finally bought chocolates for my angel and mortal and for snacking during lectures...

Just... Today's been a nice day. =) I like it!

Only thing was that I sprained my ankle.

I wonder how long it'll take for my parents to realise it.

Anyway.

I gotta run!!

I thought about in the shower...

I'm extremely sorry for whining so much during the open air gig at ngee ann today. Being a musician (at least I hope so) I've forgotten the key importance of music.

And that is to touch lives. To touch the hearts of people. Of anyone, the rich and poor, powerful and unknown alike. How could I forget, I feel so ashamed.

Though there weren't many people present, at least there was that handful, of tourists and tired employees, who stopped by, shaded by the tent from the rain, and watched and listened and smiled. I remember that sight, and now thinking back, I guess it was worth it, to alleviate whatever burdens they might have on a stormy day.

With our music.

Yesterday... After signing off, I asked around and found out a few things. Now everything's cleared up, and is so orderly.

You know how it is when something that's left hanging in the air and causes so much uncertainty? And that blessed relief when it finally lands down solidly. Sometimes, it may land the wrong way, it may cause pain. But that relief feels so much better that all pain is forgotten.

Like it is with me now. My toe may be snubbed. But man, does it feel great. At least one more mystery is closed. I shall reflect before I sleep tonight, I hope.

=)

Haha.

Today was scolded during bio for being clown-ish. Ah well.

Today's been so taxing.

Econs and Chem lectures were so very boring.

I fell sick. And I had to sleep during GP lesson, luckily the nice Mr McGregor let me.

So after that sleep I got better. Lasted through the next chem prac. It was titration. Mr Pang! Omg. But he seemed quite nice actually. So gotta wait and see.

Then rehearsal. Realised how incredibly sweet Yoke Yuan's violin is and I'm so jealous, wish I had it.

And then dinner with Lysia and Lenard at 6th ave. Came home and ate again, was so bloated.

Sigh.

I don't know, I need to sort out my thoughts now.

I'm so tired.

I'm so confused.

Yes I concede. I'm sad.

I had happiness and threw it away.

I love Beethoven's 5th symphony and I'm not afraid to proclaim that.

Why does it wreak so much intensive emotions upon a listener?

I think it's this:

Listen to the strokes of the violins. They're short and crisp. Now THAT is very, very untypical in a motive that is so intense in emotions of wrath, anger, and sadness.

When you're DAMN pissed, you don't lash out at someone in short, sharp bursts. Your rantings go on and on and on, CONTINUOUSLY.

Let me use another analogy: What deals more damage? A tidal wave or rain drops?

Answer is simple, tidal wave. It is like the long strokes of a violin bow, drawing out the emotions. And about the rain drops? Those short and crispy ones, that don't really let out the full intensity of feelings.

And that is why whenever you listen to the 5th, you feel so heavy, like your heart wants to burst out with all the sad and angry things. Because of the RESTRAINT. All emotions kept inside you that you never told anyone, all those things that you wanted to say and to do but never did.

And that's why I think its such a great piece.

But then again I could be wrong. I don't know anything about music anyway, so its best you ignore my rantings. More often than not, they'd be wrong.

But at least for me, that's why I love it. All the things inside...

Nevermind, they're for me and for me ALONE.

Once again this motive and fact of my life has made its point.

It is my FATE. I have accepted it. I do not lament over it any longer. Maybe things will be kinder to me in the future, I do not know, neither do I hope. Hope stinks. It eats even the shit out of you.

It was but another lie, made with the twirl of the hand and a carefree laugh. I remember that smirk. Not that I put the blame on anything, it was just a remark.

Hahaha! Not that they had anything to do with it. I never should have believed in such fairy tales. They are but impossible. That is the sad truth.

Tears don't flow now. Even those are kept from myself. I only laugh. Yes. To laugh in the face of these taxing trials. To do what I'm supposed to do, never mind what I want to. Showing sadness is a weakness that will only be pounced upon.

In the meantime, joy will be found in other things, to keep that smile there, to prevent it from being fake.

And of course I'll find a way to enjoy this loneliness. It's a matter of getting adapted to.

Do enjoy the 5th. All insults made against it will be promptly deleted. Screw the Tagic Overture, it's nothing compared to this titanic work.

So now it is once again time to update.

Wednesday was mostly a slack day. There were many many talks. I ponned some and went to listen to some.

During one of the breaks, completed the banner painting in under an hour! Haha, pretty easy job we painted two hands saying "6" and "2" and wrote it in roamn numerals and of course "Athena" was labelled right at the top. Easy job, but it paled really compared to the banner next to ours. It was really good. Anyway.

When the day was over, went to practice our campfire items at the amphitheatre and then went to the tech lab at the high school section to play "I want a fat babe". It wasn't a particularly good rehearsal.

In the end went to strings rehearsal late. Ran through the pieces. And I seriously faked alot alot and totally screwed up Holberg. Hahaha.

THURSDAY

Yet more talks. But I must say that the history of hwa chong one was really informative and quite touching, when they pulled down the school and all that.

Then... SE was screwed up, really.

We "learned" our fac dance. I didn't. I just sat at the back and played with Bing Yuan's phone. Faked dancing when Mr Chua walked around. Haha!

There was a campfire rehearsal that day, but I just stuck around for a while to see things falling into place first, then I left for dinner with Lenny at the 7-11, cup noodles. Then it was off the SNYO rehearsal. Playing crazay pieces like Berlioz and Brahms 2nd which I just faked through, honestly.

FRIDAY

A happening day!!

Was late again in the morning for the 2nd time. Mr Chua saw 5 of us who were late for at least 2 times. Told not to do it again hahaha... He was nice! And everyone really felt guilty after that.

Moving on, we had war games. Well. The field was extremely muddy after all the rain from previous days. It was disgusting. And the mud stank worse than a blue ribbon fart. But anyway apart from the that, and the blazing sun, I had alot of fun socialising. With people from enemy camps. I just walked around, and said, "Hi, give me a bomb to hit Athena." Then I'd walk off with a water bomb back to base, hand in the bomb, then repeat the stunt on another enemy camp. Hahaha!

Then of course I got coated with starch by the councillors even though I didn't breach the barriers. The reason they gave: I was too clean. As if it wasn't enough Lysia and Hannah started coming over and styling my hair with the disgusting starch. Hahaha. Funny.

So the game ended with Apllo winning. Athena didn't do too badly. I think we were probably second. Our water level was really low too. An improvement from previous years, I guess. Cuz seniors were telling us how Athena was always ganged up by the 3 other faculties as well. Haha! So poor thing right.

So then me, Yan Long, Perry, Nigel and Leonard went out of school to eat and bathe at my house. We went Azhar first. Had my usual teh-cino and kambing soup with rice.

Then bathed at the swimming pool. Washed my dirty stuff. Dropped them off outside my house. No key. Heh.

Went back to school.

Rehearsed a bit for the campfire item, faculty judging. Sneaked into LT4 to use. Saw Yan Long, Wan Peng and Min Kai's funny dance for the first time, it was fantastic, stomach-achingly funny!

Then it was showtime, at the audi.

Watched other groups perform for some time. Realised we didn't prepare our flag introduction speech. Leonard chiong-ed one out.

Then it was truly showtime. The flag intro was a flop. Haha, nobody really understood what leonard was trying to say, and he was quite disappointed.

Then our item!! The percussion really sounded impressive this time. Then my turn. I sang like SHIT. Seriously. Forgot lyrics and just screwed everything up. Haha sorry lah. Sigh!

But the 3 guys were GREAT! Nods. Yes they were.

We didn't expect ourselves to win, honestly. But WE DID! It came as a nasty shock as we wanted to go eat with seniors, and our 2nd item (I want a fat babe) wasn't even finalised yet when we were on stage. So we had half an hour to clean it all up. Scrapped the singing part. I couldn't possibly humiliate myself again. For that part, we just gave the show to the 3 musketeers and did stuff like wave our arms at the back. Seniors Janice and Yu Zhong stayed behind with us in the audi to give suggestions, which was really nice of them.

Other wonderful seniors bought us dinner!

So then when we went out I had to do some announcements stuff about things. Then we hung our banner at the central plaza and it was showtime. Haha! The crowd seriously went bonkers at the dance. People were screaming, "Min Kai/Wan Peng/Yan Long, I love you!!" That kinda thing. Hahaha! How fruitful.

Then of course we did our trademark 62-cheer. It goes like this:

62 gimme a 6!

6!

2!

2!

What's that??!!!

62!!

Yep. Short and sweet but it brings about the point.

Then it ended.

We won "best faculty item"!!! So cool! Was really great. Was so unexpected and Mr Chua was so happy.

=)

Had dinner that the seniors procured. It was an asortment of different types of food. I chose the rice with an otah, a fried fish, brinjal. Discarded the damn fish as it was close to inedible, being so rock solid.

Then went back to watching the Campfire. They lit the campfire and shaped the fuel into "Let's Jam!" with a nice guitar at the side. At first the "Let's" part wouldn't light up and we kept cheering until they did. Haha! So funny.

Then the song/dance part!! Everyone started doing choo-choo train things and ran around. We illegally ran onto the 3rd floor and charged across, so that everyone in the central plaza could see us. Was caught by a teacher but he let us off with a little warning! Yay. Then of course I was "dancing" with Huifen. Haha, both of us absolutely didn't know what to do and were laughing at each other like mad. =D But hey, at least I could do Beechwood. She couldn't. Ha!

And campfire ended on a really high and happy note. All 62-ians, current and past alike, gathered at the class bench and started cheering our hearts out. Then they made the 06-ers do some funny dance thing with our hands between our legs and all that. Haha... Then we went off to Waffle Town!

The entire clan os 62-ers crowded onto a 66, a handful of others were on the 170 behind. I remember I was sitting in a damn weird fashion, squatting like that. Haha!

Well we got to waffle town and started off by making sure seniors and juniors were even spaced out. Yep so just chatted throughout till 11plus and caught the last bus home. Oh there was this senior doing magic stuff and he was so damn good and freaky! Haha... Cool. Kern Cheh and Shao Ning were damn intrigued. =P

Yep. That... Was a great day.

People congratulate me on a good win at campfire.. But what I really wanna say is that I didn't do much, honestly. My classmates did.

SATURDAY

Woke up pretty early judging from the fact that I slept at around 2 the previous day? Yep. Practiced.

Then rehearsal. Had to go very early, at like 1:15pm. There was going to be this guest conductor, Theresa Cheung. Anyway, Mr Lim was pissed again at the winds because they didn't play well, and there was such an important person coming.

Anyway then it was time for Theresa, conductor of the American Symphony Orchestra, to conduct us. Well I must say her conducting is really insightful, and gave alot of interesting comments about the piece, right from the beginning, with the dominant 5th instead of a major 3rd and all that. Beautiful. Brahms is beautiful.

I faked. ALOT. Seriously alot. Sigh!

Then I went home. Was dao-ed by Alan on the bus. Idiot. HAha...

Then I went to watch Sun Yan Zi concert! Went there pretty early. It started at 830 instead of 800. Heh. When the music first came on it was so agonizingly blaring, as my seat was like just in front of the speakers. The madly cheering fans with their piercing whistles didn't help much either.

Still I think it was a great performance. Though the Singaporean crowd really is quite dead. Guest performances br F.I.R. and Tanya Chua happened.

Came out with my ears aching.

I don't think I'll go for any pop-concerts ever again. Good thing I didn;t get BSBoy's even though I loved them to bits once.

Not that I'm putting down SYZ, she really was good, but... I'm not cut out for this kinda thing, honestly. Haha.

Gave Donald a lift.

TODAY

It's been more or less another dead day. The usual church going stuff. With my iced tea during lunch.

Then came home, blogged alot.

Went to grandma's house for dinner and tv.

Came back and finished this post.

I shall make a point on a new entry.

I do not forsee any long posts after today, now that orientation is officially over, and life will revert back to mundane lessons.

I had fun. There was agony involved, I admit. But at the end of the day... I had fun. We all had fun.

I shall update the going on's of the previous few days when I wake up today. Right now it's late, and sense tells me its time to sleep.

All I want to say is:

I'm shocked, I seriously am. I don't know what to do or say. How to feel.

I admit, I'm scared this is just some joke that people loved to play with me in the past.

But what can I do? Sigh.

Hahaha. I feel like I'm fourteen again.

Hey... Today's been VERY slack.

I played Renegade online today for the FIRST EVER TIME at home with my comp!! Hahaha... Never exploited my broadband thus far until today!! Hahaha... So lame but haha its a milestone in life.

Playing online at home for the first time. Heh.

So besides slacking on the comp for 3hours so far, I played badminton with bro just now and got thrashed...

Tentatively going out to buy shoes with dad later!

Andl... I must change my outlook on things again. Haha..

Nothing much to say. There's nothing much on my mind now, and I'm not going to pretend there is.

Sometimes some things just aren't the way they SEEM to be, that's what many people say.

I couldn't agree more.

;) See ya!

It's been long days.

Yawn, am mentally and physically drained.

Saturday, my fam went to China town to just look see! Had dinner at People's Park, and I realised the food there is nice and quite cheap! The food centre there. Yum. Had hot plate black pepper beef thingy and it was great.

Then we walked around in Chinatown, and it was raining. The overhead plastic covers would periodicly release traps of accumulated water, drenching unsuspecting passerbies. I got hit once myself, though not too badly. Bro went for Xenbar salsa and I watched him for a moment... Bought 50cent canned drinks. And watched the nice fireworks. New year's was more magnificent, but still, it was still beautiful. Too bad of the rain.

Oh and we met our next door neighbours there too. How ironical.

SUNDAY

Went out for church then lunch as usual.

Then went to Orchard in the rain to meet up with Fang Zhou. Was mugged by charity at Orchard MRT again. Then after quite a bit of walking around in the popular, finally met her. We decided to watch a movie and after walking half the way to cine, realised that it'd better to go Lido instead cuz there was no rain. So spastic. Hahaha.

Got to Lido at 4:05 and what the heck, due to time, just decided to catch the 4pm Narnia. But when we got in it hadn't even started. Hahaha, I was so lucky.

So Narnia isn't as bad as I thought it would be. In fact it really was quite good, if really corny and unbelievable. But its interesting and the storyline's quite captivating. Thought the bickering among the kids were a little irritating most of the time but still... Haha, enjoyed myself.

Then we had cheese noodles from taka!! Walked all the way back again. Heh. Ate on the steps at Orchard MRT.

Took an MRT to Cityhall. For Grace Lee's concert.

Waved goodbye to her halfway there cuz I needed to run cuz I was late.

Still got there late in the end. Missed one movement of Beethoven.

But still. Caught a great performance. And that's all I want to say now. Her tone was good. I'm not in a music-ky mood. What the hell. What do I know about music anyway.

The 4 Nocturnes by George Crumb were extremely hilarious to watch though.

After, went to 7-11 at citi-link with Jon Koh to get a drink. Met people like Rachel, Zara, Joyce, Mrs Tay. Talked and hung around a bit and left.

Alone!

Haha. Jon Koh deserted me.

By the way, I don't like making decisions.

I don't like consequences.

TODAY

Had amazing race in the first half of the day, station games the next. It was FUN!

First stop was this water slide thingy. A canvas sheet along a slope with soapy water and we were to get to the top of it. Our team had this hump right in the middle so it really was cheating quite a bit. Just chiong-ed up the damn thing with Yi Jia and got it over with. Aside a few drops of sprayed water, I was dry!

Then a few jokers just slid down the thing for fun. Hahaha! Hilarious.

Then we had this thing where we pushed waterbombs along a table and relayed them to someone to throw into a bucket... Some class started a waterbomb fight and got scolded by Glory-Joy... Bleah! Made her angry, they did. =(

Oh oh there was this station where we had to form chinese characters with our bodies and someone guess it. We ended up cheating like crazy. Hahaha! Karin was our IC and oh my god so havoc!! So funny to watch her exasperation. Hahahahaha! =D

Then I also remember this station where we had to roll a ball along with our bodies, and use our butts and our heads and all. Hahaha. Funny. But teamwork solves all! Hur hur.

Then lunch. I lost my class and walked all over the place, even to chinese high, to find them. In the end I realised they were in the hall all the long. Sigh! But I'd already had lunch by then, and I just tagged along for theirs. Met Lenard, Lysia and Hanna and just talked, over my ice cream.

Then wet station games.

First was WATER BOMB FIGHT!!! AH AH AH so fun!! Haha! But the councillor in charge was so stern! Yuck. Haha. But still, had fun. Finally got wet, but still not THAT wet.

Then, jack n jill. Some human checkers thingy. Jumping around on squares and killing each other off like in pepsi-cola in pri sch? Haha...

Then LOST. Some string maze thing where we were supposed to be blindfolded. But who cared. We just cheated and it was over in moments.

Then PINBALL. But it resembled more of captain's ball, except with a hoola hoop as the score thingy, and allocated mobile and immobile players. Totally destroyed the other group. The half where I played in, they scored only one!! So fun so powerful haha...

Then our class went off to discuss campfire item and banner. Haha... Won't elaborate much here. But I guess.. I helped a little to get things into order and things went smoothly after, with alot of help from seniors and everyone chipping in of course, and then we could all go home, which was honestly my main motivation to get things moving.

=D

Made Lysia and Hannah wait for nothing, so embarrassing.

I hate making decisions still.

I'm... Still...

Like that.

Sigh, I don't really like myself. I wish I were better.

The scottish is so beautiful!!

Hi guys, one week of orientation over, one to go!

Anyway on thursday, we had more games! Yay! We were supposed to have 6stations, but because of lightning and rain risk, we only managed to play 4. In order: twin soccer, chapteh, street fighter and DODGEBALL!!

For twin soccer we got a partner and tied two of legs together, so its like three-legged players with two heads hobbling around. At first we were quite stupid and scored 2 goals against ourselves, before we realised that we were shooting at the wrong place. After the first half, it was 2-1 against us.

Then after half time break, nobody wanted to continue on our team anymore. My partner, Lixi, and I couldn't continue cuz our ribbon had been torn to shreds by repetitive breaking. So, in the end our team was three pairs of players down, but then they allowed me and Lixi as the only twin to be able to run about WITHOUT TYING OUR LEGS!!! So cool!! So we just ran around blocking shots and tacking people and though the 2nd half was somehow extremely short, we managed to pull one goal back, making it 2 all. Yay!

Haha, quite stupid cuz we actually scored all 4 goals.

Then it was chapteh, and we played it at the badminton court, kicking it over the net and stuff. The girls were allowed to use their hands! But after all of Chinese High's chapteh pro-ness, in the end, it was still the server who would win, because nobody could hit over the net, only if you were ultra-lucky.

Which we were, and we lead by 2 by the end of the game. But our OG lost out in creating a chapteh cheer. So in the end, we lost.

Next street fighter! It was quite a lame funny game. Two blindfolded unfortunates from opposing teams would have a water-bomb and a bottle of water, trying to make the other as wet as possible, with OG members shouting instructions.

Guffaws. One of our guys cheated and got caught. Haha.

I didn't play, but still got wet in the end as one councillor sneakily pounced on me and watered me with a bucket.

Then dodgeball!! Dodgeball was extremely fun. So we'd throw a ball at each other, at opposite sides of a tennis court, trying to hit people and put them into prison. But these prisoners could "backstab" themselves outta jail. My team got slaughtered. But it was fun! Rescuing prisoners by sending the ball to them to throw at others, and dodging everything, and killing opponents. Hahaha.

So I guess my OG could be considered a "loser" group. We didn't win anything at all. Haha.

But still, I love my OG. Yay! Because after that me, Karin (the OGL!), Michelle, Lysia, Jit Neng and Ben went to Thai noodle house for dinner together. I didn't eat, just hung around with them and had a coke. So we just talked and bonded and had a lot of fun! We did. Haha, me and Ben suan-ed Karin like crazy but so fun! =D

Then I went home.

It was Mom's birthday.

But I shall elaborate no further.

Oh. I was lucky to be able to borrow sandals from jack, as he was sick and needed to go home. Otherwise shoes would be wet and muddy.

And. Guess what happened to my phone.

1. It fell into the urinal

2. Yong Keong was peeing in it

Argh!! Okay but I came home and soaped it up and now its clean. It really is. Yay!

TODAY

We got into our CTs for the first time today. My class sort of rocks. 7 of us ortus guys!! So cool! Me, YiJia, WanPeng, Yan Long, Min Kai, Perry and Nigel!! Hahaha! The DOTA-allstars class. Yaydles!!! So cool so fun. =)

So we got to meet our C tutor, Mr Chua Kah Hean. Soft spoken guy, but quite humourous in a lame sense, but still, its humour, and I really appreciate that. Hope it will be the beginning of a great time with him. Physics!!

Had ice breakers for a while with the CT. But I guess they were a bit stone. And I think Glory-Joy is a really funnily-cute name!!

Then of course we had mass dance, songs and cheers.

And we met our senior class! They are really quite nice people. Treated us with warmth, and really chirpy and energetic, quite unlike the stone-d us. So we played games like "Honey honey I love you, will you please smile for me?" "Honey, I love you too but I'm sorry, I can't smile for you" Haha! Yep. One guy would say the first line to another, and the other had to say the 2nd, without smiling/laughing. Hur hur. Yay I can keep straight faces!

Then there was the tiu -tiu-tiu game where we shoot each other... Hahaha!

And the toilet paper game, where the number of sheets of toilet paper you draw, means the number of questions people can ask you about your personal life.

Then our 06S62 cheer! Haha!

My seniors are nice, funky people.

After that met up with strings guys, and Lysia!

We went to BTP KFC for dinner.

Talked and talked and talked and suan-ed each other like crazy it was so fun so wacky.

=)

I'm in a high mood now.

Gonna practice!

Have finally found a stable host on Galven's illusione. Yay. Unlimited files and everything lalalala.

Okay, today's been a eventful day, but I shall update other times.

Whee.

I hope the scottish works now... Bleah. Its tough work, this. Finding ways to upload.

Anyway.

About my new year escapades... In the evening I went to Ying Liang's place for some new year dinner party thing. There, many many generations of ex-chinese high string orch-ers gathered! Hahaha! And the oldest was Mr Goh. Haha, yep. So we were just talking a lot of nonsense during the thing, eating yummy food. We were talking about some funny thing, something along the lines of 9******2. Hahahaha! Oh my god I can't believe this I still remember the number!! Ok I'd better skip a few digits... There. That's done. Guffaws!!! Snigger snigger.

Then we took photos of all the many generations of people, with Ying Liang's mom as our mascot. Then, the "quan jia fu" or "completed family picture". Heh heh! Had to squeeze tightly for everyone to get in. After, used Ying Liang's comp for a little while then ran out to get a cab to Clementi MRT to meet Andris.

So took a train to City Hall... On the train noticed alot of people staring at her... Weird. Finally got to City Hall. Waited around for one of her friends didn't know which one. Bought my bus pass thingy. Lenard renewed his concession. Got chased away from the entrance by the policeman. It was also so crowded, so we decided to just go esplanade first and wait there in the relative quiteness. RELATIVE. Didn't mean to say that esplanade wasn't all that crowded too.

Used the bathroom, and I walked into the baby diaper room to check it out, after making sure that there was no one in it first, of course. It was quite a nice room really. Nice toilet, sink and there was a comfy cushioned bence with pillows on it! Haha... I guess it wouldn't be so nice when there was a bawling, soiled baby in it though. Shudders.

Anyway soon her friends came. Chee Han and... Kiwi? Kui Wui? Kee Wui? Or something I can't remember I just know "something" Wui. But for convenience's sake, I shall hereby address him as "Kiwi"! =)

We walked around to the bay outside ESPN (hee, my personal acronym for Esplanade). Realised we came late and it was so crowded. So we walked over to Marina Square. Walked around there as well. Wanted to get my Macs Mcflurry but didn't in the end. So we just ambled along. I didn't say much, was just observing the crowds all the time...

Somehow, alone as usual. Just being dao. Just living in my own world.

But nevermind about that. Then 11:30 came and we made our way back to the bay again. There were this bunch of fat malay girls making a nuisance of themselves, spraying aerosols all over the place, hitting hapless by-standers like myself. Hmpf. How extremely unpleasant and irritating. So enough about that anyway. The fireworks came on, cutting short the din coming from a makeshift stage nearby (with extremely out-of-tune of SHE singles, as if that band ever created great music anyway).

What can I say about it. It was fantastic. It lasted so long, had so many climaxes the last one being so awe-inducing... Just really jaw-dropping. Even better than N-day's. I can't describe it. With words, you should have seen for yourself.

And we were lucky we got a good spot too. Just a small portion of the sky obscured by an over-hanging tree.

Definitely the highlight of many days, that.

But after that was hell. It was a mob. The crowds took to the roads, blocking traffic. Car drivers honked repeatedly in exasperation, but no one seemed to care and just crossed whenever they wanted. Some punks even jeered at the police who were giving directions, and disobeyed orders outright. It was a riot, or close to it. Just that there was no fighting, of course.

Walked all the way from esplanade to hill street. Bought some drinks at a Cheers. Waited for a bus for 1 hour plus...

In vain.

In the end ran over all the place, ending up at Plaza Sing. Took a cab home from there.

After that, I shall not update anymore what happened at home when I got there at 3am.

NEW YEAR'S DAY

It was a unhappening, absolutely forgettable day.

Went to church.

Went to grandma's place.

Period.

MONDAY

Viola lesson. Bad lesson. Didn't play all at all well.

So now.. It's orientation. 2 weeks of it. So far there's been all academic talks about subject combinations and stuff. I've been through it twice already back in the high school. Hence it was boring.

Other than the talks, there's been a few ice-breaker's yesterday. Namely, whacko and polar bear. Hahahaha. Reminds me of Baohe's rambo bear back in SO camp 2004. One bear took out a whole village. Hahaha!

Then there was a dance session as well.. At first it was ok.. But when the steps started to get harder, those at the back couldn't see a thing, and I just gave it up trying. Then there were cheers and songs as well.. Can't get the college english song's tune. Its hard. Cheers? Bah.

Today was just a whole string of talks talks talks. I hid at the back of the auditorium and slept on the floor.

After the whole thing was waiting for Lenard's SSP results. He got in the 2nd round, but he didn't go for it in the end. Had lunch at HC's canteen, guess who I saw!! ;)

Yes we saw Jon Low come to crash orientation!! Haha!

And of course.. Other things. =)

Beams. My obsession shall have to be put to sleep soon, when work starts to come by the tonnes. Ah well.

Then we went over to the high-school side to get Lenard's AEP report card. And met up with a few teacher's also.. =) nice people. Somehow you never appreciate them when they're teaching you, but you only do once the year's over.

Ah well. The mysteries in life. Tata. I shall now go explore the mysteries of jogging.

I'm sorry for the unresponsiveness of the Scottish... I just can't find a good file host. And a free one at that. Any suggestions, anyone?

Anyhow, I don't think this problem will be solved anytime soon... School's starting already tomorrow... And... I don't know what to think. Why? Because it's a completely new thing, I don't know anything about this year at all. And that's not a good thing to me. I don't like unknowns.

I realised a bit today, in the bathroom. I'm always realising and learning things about myself in that most unlikely place. Maybe, cuz that's there's the only place I am truly alone, and know that I won't be disturbed, and I can reflect.

Anyway, this is what I realised: I am not a heartless being after all. I have goals, aspirations, and emotional attractedness towards attitudes of love and warmth. I am an advocate of love, friendships, and relationships. But I know my limits, and my prioties, and I set them out clearly before me to prevent myself from going off the wrong track. And everytime I do, I know that I haul myself back in with all that I've got, some times with negative effect to myself, and the closest people around me at the time. It may hurt, but it will serve me good in the long run. Hopefully, this process will not be so difficult when time goes by, and I get used to this new lifestyle.

Strong walls hide a soft within. I don't need strong walls now. Not when I have a tough inner system that leads me in the right track all the way. At least there's no bitterness, only bright sunny days.

My new life, for a new year.

JBI. Hahaha. My old days of playing raw deal in a hidden corner of school.

Anyway, I'll post my new year day's escapades soon. Not today, for sleep beckons.

Happy new year, everyone, though one year late. May this year be blessed with triumphs and joy.

=)

Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth.

YAAARH!!!! =D